I bought a publicity package where I got trained to pitch via Skype to 15 different TV morning news show producers across the US last week. I am still in PTSD recovery and here are the horrible things that I saw…

I’m not as Hot Sh$$ as I Thought I was

I have always enjoyed a very successful visible life. For years I’ve done public speaking, numerous local TV and radio interviews, videos and even hosted my own video interview series. Without fail, I’ve always enjoyed accolades, lots of client conversions and repeat invitations to go back for more of me. I was utterly and completely unprepared to be rejected, criticized, demoralized and yelled at in this experience. It was horrible and horribly revealing. When you have to step up to play a bigger game, it’s not comfortable, it’s not easy and it doesn’t feel natural.

Even Millionaires Can Be Humiliated

The training room was full of millionaires and successful people. For the first time in my life, I even met a 9-figure business owner woman! These poor people were just as challenged, rejected, yelled at and stretched to be something they didn’t feel comfortable being. I’ve heard in previous classes, some have cried. Others admitted to having cried later when they were alone. These were very accomplished men and women in their own fields and I saw that even they struggled with the things they had to do that horrified them, just so they could get on TV.

To be on TV You Have To Be Willing To Make An A$$ of Yourself

Lawyers had to bend the truth, a business woman had to tear up money for drama, the most serious looking introverted guy in the room had to wear Mickey Mouse ears, a John’s Hopkins educated physician had to rap and I had to do a Richard Dreyfuss imitation to be even considered interesting enough to be picked during the audition. In most cases, even that didn’t get me to break through. It was horrifying to watch myself on tape and to undertake. I have so much respect for actors and all performers. They make a living doing something most people would rather die than do.

Energy Is The Only Important Thing

Your looks, your pedigree, your segment topic, your color or weight had NOTHING to do with being picked by the producers. They picked the people who had the most energy. For me, that was horrifying because I had to speak like I was yelling and memorize and spit out the entire segment like a machine. I can’t even look at my performance without cringing. Forcing myself to perform somebody else’s words in a contrived way every hour for 2 full days, back to back was like being on a constant firing line . I’m still recovering from the adrenaline rush. The true horror was reconciling myself to go against everything I teach which is being true to yourself and letting your own personality shine. I was someone else during those entire auditions. And it still didn’t help me score big points.

Winners Get Up and Keep On Going

This morning, when I came back to my practice and I heard excuses from my clients, I had less than usual patience and tolerance for it. I have been transformed. After having had the ‘come to Jesus’ talk with myself at my lowest hour when I had to decide if I was going to keep going or just walk out, I now hold myself and everyone around me to a higher standard. The only thing that distinguishes winners from everyone else is how they treat overwhelming challenges. And this horrific experience was that for me. From the ashes of this past week’s horror, I will create success. Or die trying.
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