This past week, I went to the International Coach Federation’s conference where neuroscientist Richard Boyatzis was the keynote. Let me say that the man was a fountain of information for anyone working in the human potential industry (like myself). Here are some of the pearls he dropped. Straight from his lips to your eyes via this blog.
The Emotional Mind Makes The Decision, The Rational Mind Makes You Feel Better About It
Any time I have a sales conversation with a prospect and I ask them if they’re ready to work with me, they have already made the decision based on how I made them feel. They then rationalize those feelings by telling themselves things to justify their decision. For example, if they felt excited by working with me to produce their dreams then their mind tells them about my credentials and all my success. Unfortunately if they feel scared about spending money to hire a coach, their emotions make the decision not to work together, then their rational mind tells them that it’s not the right time or that their business isn’t ready etc. etc. Be very very careful about how you’re rationalizing and how you’re making your decisions.
Adaptability Is At The Heart Of Every Kind Of Success
Wow, can I tell you about a coffee meeting I just came from with a 30-year-old multi million dollar business owner woman? She is the embodiment of this statement. She went from being a pastry chef to having to manage her ailing father’s empire with no prior training in the industry, to almost going bankrupt, to rebuilding the entire business. Now she’s poised to become an international speaker. I asked her the secret to her success and she said Adaptability. Somehow, she was always very good at doing what needed and being ok with it. What can you adapt to that you’ve been resisting to grow your business?
The Idea That People Don’t Change Is Ridiculous
I am such a wholehearted fan of this statement. After all, every day I see the evidence of how after 40 years on this earth, I was able to break through my immigrant conditioning and change my money blueprint to live the life of my dreams. If I can do it, it can be done and I’m just getting started. If you’re holding on to the belief that people don’t change or that YOU can’t or won’t change, then I invite you to take Boyatzis’ advice and take a second look at that limiting belief.
Constructive Criticism Is Still Criticism
Boyatzis revealed that negative emotions in humans actually register a larger impact than positive ones so unfortunately during the course of a day, if you want to change your life for the better, you need to oversample the positive emotions to overcome the negative ones that are flooding your life. Criticism is another thing that causes negative emotions, even if it’s constructive. So the next time you’re tempted to criticize someone under the pretext of helping them, recognize that you might actually be hurting them. Cruel to be kind is no longer considered to be so kind.
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